10 Reasons Why Windows is the Best OS

Look, we all know and realize that Windows is the superior operating system to anything else out there.  With that said, I am going to detail ten reasons why this is the case and offer supporting data.  Some of this may be shocking to you if you are a user of another operating system, but please… don’t feel inferior.

Windows is the best OS because:

1. The Bugatti Veyron is the fastest, most powerful and most expensive sports car in the world.  Windows is the most expensive PC operating system so it is the fastest too.
2. Windows commercials are the funniest.  Comon, a Mac and a PC guy are friends and always competing… FUNNY, therefore Windows must be the funniest OS too!
3. Everyone knows that the more letters something has in its name the better it is.  OS X – 3 letters, crappy.  Linux – 5 letters, almost there.  Windows 7 – 8 letters, AWESOME!
4. Windows is the most user friendly operating system.  What would you rather kick if it isn’t working, a window or a snow leopard; and which do you think would be more friendly if you kicked it? Seriously, no one wants to kick a penguin.
5. Windows Users are more likely to eat things like Tuna Fish, a Hero, or a Patty Melt; while Mac OS X users are more likely to eat Hummus, Banh Mi, or Shawarma (Hunch.com).  At least Windows Users are eating normal stuff. Mac Users; I don’t even know what those things are!
6. Windows is what Linux and Mac users play games on; that is if they can’t afford a PS3, an XBOX 360, or a Wii.
7. Windows is so great that Mac OS X has things like Boot camp & Parralells, so you can run Windows on a Mac with it!
8. Windows has a key on a keyboard named after it, the Windows Key.  Linux doesn’t have a key named after it. Macs have a special key, but it’s ominously called the “command key.”
9. Windows is better because it’s not named after a hamburger. Albeit was a good hamburger, its been getting worse over the years; the price goes up and the quality goes down. (MAC OS X)
10. Windows is helping the overall economy recover from the recession.  After all, it keeps a lot of specialists and repair technicians employed.  Therefore, Windows cares more about our economy than Macs do.

I hope you enjoyed this article, I had to let off some steam after my “Why I am Dumping Firefox” article.